Japan RT
Category 14,  Topic 14
Message 180       Thu May 28, 1992
B.DUNN6 [Doug Dlin]          at 05:40 EDT
 
I think the entire background bit there was a parody of The Monkees' song
"Zilch", where they'd say a phrase, repeat it, say another phrase, repeat it
and the first one, say a third, repeat all three (3-2-1 order), and so on.  I
can't catch all of it.  I keep losing attention when they get to the bit about
the pineapple, which is_still_one of the funniest parts of the whole thing for
me!  I won't try to spell the ultimate weapon's name.  Part of the whole gag
about it anyway is that Matt & CB keep changing the spelling.  It's pronounced
/shloo-be-boom-bar-ha-ha/, give or take a syllable.

OK, two anime filks coming up, as promised elsewhere.  Both are written by
Christina Callahan, whom those of you who attended AnimeCon may remember as P-
Chan.  She deserves all the credit for creativity!

     THEY CALL THEM THE DIRTY PAIR
   Sung to the "Super Chicken" theme

Note: This song sings best when you have one of those Pocket Revengers to
simulate the sounds of destruction.  If you don't, get someone with a creative
voice.

 The future has two troubleshooters
 Cute of face and large of hooters.
 They're a fighting team beyond compare.
 (POW-POW, KER-RASH)
 For mass destruction they're first-rate,
 So they have earned a name they hate.
 They ca-a-all them the Dirty Pair!

 Nanmo's fixing this and that
 While Mughi's running from a rat
 And Yuri is concerned about her hair.
 (FRIZAP, CRUUNGE)
 Kei is getting in a fight
 And scoping every guy in sight,
 So do-o-o-n't call the Dirty Pair!

 They're infamous to all encountered races,
 (KER-BAM)
 But you must call them Lovely Angels to their faces!
 (AT-AT-AT-AT)

 They will cause a conflagration.
 You will get no reparation.
 They will nuke it all with style and flair.
 (FA-SHOOM, FA-SHOOM)
 So if you want your wagon fixed,
 Your ticket punched, your bucket kicked,
 Then ca-a-a-ll out the Dirty Pair!
 (KA-BAM, AUUGGH!)
 Ca-a-all out the Dirty Pair!
 (FOOSH, ZA-POW)
 Ca-a-all out the Dirty Pair!
 (_KRA-BOOM_!!!)

              RYO CAME BACK
 Sung to the tune of "The Cat Came Back"

 Yoshiko Tanaka was quivering with dread.
 She knew her ex-husband would love to see her dead!
 The cops couldn't help, though she told them of her woe,
 So she hired herself a sweeper, one Saeba Ryo.

 He was a sukebe, but he sure did know his work,
 And it didn't take him long to eliminate the jerk.
 He asked her for a date; she politely told him no,
 But when he asked her for her panties, she told him where to go.

 Bu-u-u-t Ryo came back the very next day.
 Ryo came back, walking straight into her bedroom!
 Yes, Ryo came back; he just wouldn't stay away.

 She called up his manager to come and set him straight,
 And when Kaori arrived, it was clear she was irate!
 With her hundred-ton mallet, she put him in his place,
 And dragged him back home with the mallet-rash on his face.

 Bu-u-u-t Ryo came back the very next day.
 Ryo came back and he stole her favorite teddy!
 Yes, Ryo came back, he just wouldn't stay away.

 Yoshiko next called on Saeko for aid
 In the hope that temptation might lure Ryo away.
 Saeko dangled her 37E
 And he trailed her out the door, as obedient as could be.

 Bu-u-u-t Ryo came back the very next day.
 Ryo came back, hiding naked in the shower!
 Yes, Ryo came back; he just wouldn't stay away.

 Next came Umibozu, fully loaded up for bear.
 In his hands was a bazooka, on his face a livid glare.
 But Ryo pulled out a kitten, which made the big guy freak,
 And the bullets and bazooka rounds were flying for a week.

 Bu-u-u-t Ryo came back the very next day.
 Ryo came back and was trying on her garters!
 Yes, Ryo came back; he just wouldn't stay away.
 He just wouldn't stay awa-a-a-y!

Whew!  Had to retype half of this twice 'cause the darned system shut down on
me for no explained reason right in the middle of the first attempt.  Wonder
if I've still time to check everything else on my list before peak hours set
in?
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