-!-=Anime Fan Fiction=-!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!- -!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!- Beevis & Butthead in Mega Tokyo 2032 -!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!- 2032, Mega-Tokyo. It's a typical night along the GENOM tower outskirts, full of noises, searchlights, screams, etc. As the point of view shifts, we see the Ginza, also full of noises, lights, traffic, etc. However, two filthy gaijin stand out from the crowd. As they stand on the sidewalk, shoppers avoid them like the plague. One is blond, the other is dark- haired; both are ugly. Their eyes appear to be focused to infinity, and their mouths are spouting out a semblance of a conversation. Beevis: Hehehe-he he heh Butthead: Huh huh huhuh huheh heh... Hu- Hey Beevis! Beevis: Yeah! He-heh Butthead: Huh, what would happen if, like, hehe, a BUMA took and like, stuck it's HEAD up its BUTT... [pause] and then, huh, SHOT its partikal beam! Huh huh huhuh Beevis: HAH heheh heh! Butthead: Wouldn't that be awesome! Hehuh huh... that'd be kooooooool... The regular Ginza-goers give strange looks to the two as they stand there apathetically. A fly or two buzz around them. A sushi bar closes early due to the two. Beevis: I'm bored! This sucks! Butthead: Like, me too, huhhuh. Let's KILL something! Beevis and Butthead stand there with empty stares. A nearby mall gains their attention and is zoomed in on. The two hold an impromptu soccer game, using men, women and small children as the soccer-balls, and store fronts as goalposts. Beevis is accidentally kicked in the head by Butthead; blood flies everywhere. A store owner lowers a security fence, which Beevis and Butthead take immediate advantage of and use as a net. Several well-to-do civilians get strained into ground chuck. Again, Beevis is kicked in the head by Butthead; again, blood goes all over the place. Beevis: Heheheh heh heh Butthead: Huhuh huhuhuh hehuh, that was fuuuuun! [pauses for station ID, then starts humming Black Sabbath's 'Paranoid'] DA DA DAN dadadadadadadada DA DA DAN dadadadadadadada... Suddenly, the familiar WHOOOSH-vrrr-thud sound of Hardsuits landing is heard. Sylia: KNIGHT SABERS - SAN*OO! [sound glitch, sorry] Beevis and Butthead are awestruck; they become rapt with attention. As the camera zooms in on the two, their mouths drop open, their eyes tear up, and the reflections waver like Sailor Moon's. The music to 2001 starts playing in the background. Meanwhile, the Sabers try to figure out exactly what the hell is up with these guys. Just as Priss gets fed up, the music halts, their eyes go bloodshot, and- Beevis + Butthead: ************************************************************* KNIGHT SABERS BASE-BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ************************************************************* -yeah, they shout that line out... As they let out their yell, the intensity of the sound causes the ground to rumble, and the Sabers lose their footing. Still yelling, Beevis and Butthead's skin begins to ripple, tear and shred apart, revealing their true Buma nature. Beevis: Hey, Butthead! Check out your body, man! Heh Butthead: Heavy metal, man, Huhuh! Da da DA DA DA, DA DA DA DA DA DA DA, da da da... Nene: [regains her balance] Iyaaa; where did these guys COME from? Yuck! Sylia: Deploy into diamond formation! Linna, knuckle bomber attack! Linna: Nmmmmm... whatever... Linna takes three steps, jumps, and flies down at Butthead, fist-first. Butthead picks up a parked GENOM motorcycle and swings it at her, knocking her into an office building lobby. With her Hardsuit cracked and bloody, Linna passes out. Nene attacks Beevis, but she gets caught and crumpled up into a fetal position. He pitches to Butthead, but Butthead misses and Nene bounces along for a few blocks before she stops. Before Largo can even finish saying "Ball one!", Sylia and Priss jointly attack. Butthead manages to knock Sylia into the next episode, but Priss is left standing. Priss: [to herself] Where did these gaikokujin get these Buma bodies? And how come they're so powerful? Kusooo... [out loud] Hey, you two! Beevis: Hehehe heh heh, hey, Butthead! Butthead: Hah huh, yeah?! Beevis: What's the score man?! Butthead: Like, I, huh, dunno, dude, huhuh... Priss: DAMMIT, ARE YOU LISTENING TO ME?!? Beevis and Butthead, blissfully unaware of Priss for some weird reason, go into their seventh-inning stretch routine, headbanging "Take me out to the ball game...". They laugh for a few seconds, then Priss starts machine- gunning needles into the two. Unfortunately, she succeeds in getting them to listen. Beevis and Butthead rush her, taking Priss and bouncing her off seven different skyscrapers before she even knows what happened. And, of course, Butthead accidentally hits Beevis, spraying oil, blood and goop everywhere. Priss, almost unconscious, lies unmoving, having had the living crap beaten out of her (like usual). Macky: WAAAAAAH! Sylia, having been knocked forward an episode, ended up knocking Macky back an episode, due to the fact that he'd decided to disguise himself in Priss's spare Hardsuit/Motoslave to spy on his sister. Now that he'd been knocked into the episode before next, he found himself falling out of the sky down towards the Ginza. With a loud crash, Macky lands in a full dumpster along with the Motoslave. Priss, with her last ounce of strength (...), pulls the combination Hardsuit/Motoslave out of the garbage, and puts it on. Priss: Right, you bastards! This is it!!! Beevis: Batter up! heheh Priss, with the aid of the Motoslave, tears out a large chunk of sewer pipe and takes a batter's stance. Beevis and Butthead charge at maximum speed, only to be swatted aside by Priss. Butthead: [dizzied] Whoa-ho, huh, whut happened? Beevis: I dunno! Let's try again! The two charge again, and are repulsed by the Motoslave's cannons. Beevis and Butthead's Buma bodies shatter into small slivers and chunks. With a final "Bummer, man..." Beevis dies. As Butthead dies, he utters "Huhuh huh, cooool", and then coughs up a glop of oil. Both of them live happily ever after in Hell playing Satan football and singing a-capella Deep Purple songs. Priss, hobbling along in the Motoslave, is illuminated by the sunrise as she slowly heads home... -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- = Rich Anderson is: radman@ = The fund: = = bz079@cleveland.Freenet.Edu = 3421 S. Tibbs ave. / Indy, IN 46241 = -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- "I say thee NAUGHT! Thy fate is sealed, BIGTIME!!!" -Yuri, from DP 4: Sim Hell